Friday, January 20, 2012

Looking Ahead with Thirst for Change (Part I)

2008 was a historical year for me. The preparation for the Christmas season started as early as January. I would fill more than twenty ang paos (that Chinese traditional red envelope for good luck as they say) with crispy 20 or 50 Peso bills until a target amount is reached. It was a self-imposed saving practice with an objective of giving my god children and relatives simple presence come Christmas Day. Supplemented with patience and discipline, my strategy blossomed with good fruit. And I owe it to my regular job and my measly income.


The next three years were disappointing. 2011 was the complete opposite. Since business was a bit struggling to make a smash hit, I just generously shared my time and navigation skills (my cousin says I’m a walking directory. lol). Last year, more than 50% of our clan celebrated Christmas in the Metropolis. Being the only true-blooded Manilena, I was a tour guide for a day slash baby sitter (hehe). There was inner joy, but honestly, I was not contented with the downgrade (haha).
                                                                                                                         
This year, I will stick to my old ways of saving. And that’s using piggy bank. I believe that this primitive method has always been effective. If I was broke in the previous years, I only have myself to blame. It’s not about being jobless and not having stable earnings or a failed saving ritual but rather due to my vulnerability to temptations I tasted unpleasant events one after the other.

Thus, I am going to blog about my goals for this year as a constant reminder that I have things to do and of course accomplish. Many times I have been accused of procrastinating. I maybe hardworking but I lack aggressiveness and will. Reading my old posts made me realize that I have been torturing myself with painful memories by continuously pressing the play button in my head. For a while I thought it was a great way to let go of the suppressed feelings. Unknowingly, it draws me closer to immobility and frustration. This time around, I am hoping that when I look back at the end of the year I can write about stories of overflowing happiness and triumphs.
                                                                                                                                                                         
Photo grabbed @ butterflydiary.com

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