I'm Your Fan!

Every year we encounter various events (good and bad) that have huge effect on our lives. Last year, was no different.

I lost my job last December. To those who know my work history, it’s no longer surprising. They are immune to hearing the words “Nagresign na ko” (I resigned already) or “Wala na kong work” (I’m jobless). Lately, I’ve been thinking so much about the excruciating experiences I had with my previous company. I am trying to suppress the thought, but the grudges still seem fresh. Maybe because I have always been the kind of person, when confronted by a complex situation or a budding conflict, would rather not expose my vulnerability. There was no clear closure between me and the basis of my resignation. Things just didn’t end well.

I thought my last job prior to my work as a sales secretary was the most depressing already. But as days go by, I’m starting to realize that all exit experience is painful. No pain is actually more superior to the other. Saying goodbye to the faces I’ve learned to love and care for is probably the very reason why leaving is always difficult. Without a choice, I had to pack my things and wave my hands. Along with it, however, are the precious learnings and good memories.

Of course, reflecting is more meaningful if we talk about great blessings. Last year, God granted one of my biggest dreams – to attend the Kerygma Feast every Sunday together with my family. It took me almost one year to persuade them. Just when I was about to give up, God answered my prayer. It was sometime in 2nd quarter of 2008 when they told me they wanted to give it a try. At the back of my mind I was asking myself, “Are they serious?” When we reached Valle Verde Country Club, that’s the only time I became totally convinced. And the rest is history.

In 2008, I also heard one of the most shocking accolades I’ve received in my entire life. “I’m your fan” kuya Rowin said. What was he thinking? Was he out of his mind? I just couldn’t absorb it.

He was asking about my occupation. I answered him truthfully although I really wanted to lie. hehe!. He told me not to give up and just keep on trying. Then, he inquired about my blog. “I became unmindful of it since I'm busy with work,” I replied. He encouraged me to continue what I have started. Next, he told me “Fan mo ko" (I’m your fan).

The conversation occurred in his daughter’s wake. I was supposed to be the one comforting him but it seemed to me that our roles transformed. Whether there was a truth to that or just a joke, kuya Rowin lifted my weakening spirit. It helped me believe in myself when I was going through some emotional battle - when it seemed to me that I was doing no good... :(

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Kuya Rowin, did I ever say thank you? In a critical point in your life you cheered me up when you yourself needed more understanding. I was speechless and could not believe. That short statement might not have a powerful effect if it came from someone else mouth. It has actually become a music to my ears. Now, I visit my blog regularly. And as I scrutinize my old posts, I tell myself “Not bad.” Hehe! But seriously, I should be the one telling you “I’m your fan!”